Put your hand quickly to hat and slowly to purse

This dates from the days when most men wore hats and lifted them politely to ladies to show respect. It encourages the importance of good manners and regard for the rights of others.

But it also cautions you to be wary about money matters. It is all very well to be kind and considerate but charity begins at home. Being too generous to misfortunate others could end up bankrupting yourself and it is always a lot better to be able to give, than have to receive, a handout.

So, the advice is: be a good, considerate person but don't be over generous or careless with your finances.

Bad luck often brings good luck

We all suffer bad luck from time to time: financial, emotional or just a broken cup, but it is rarely the end of the world. The loss of a job can be devastating but many people have found new and more worthwhile careers as a result of a down spell. Take time to revaluate your life and find new and better direction. Losing a partner will hurt but can lead to meeting someone more suitable.

The important thing about a random chance event that knocks you back is to look for the silver lining. Most very successful people have had major setbacks in their lives but they didn't let it stop them. Where there's a will there's a way.

After you have licked your wounds, stop feeling sorry for yourself and get on with life.

You may give him good advice, but who can give him the wit to take it?

This is a saying that might have the ladies smiling a knowing smile, and brings to mind some lines by the Scottish poet Robert Burns:

"O gentle dames it gars me greet (makes me cry)
Tae see how many counsels sweet
How many lengthy, sage advices
The husband frae the wife despises."

How often in your life have you been given what you know to be good advice but failed to take it? Humans are not entirely rational beings and our emotional impulses often outweigh reasoned thought.

However, part of what a man loves in a woman is the irrational, exuberant disregard for reason when they allow their hearts to overrule their heads and fall in love with him.

Better a blush on the face than a spot on the heart

The day and age of the "nice girl" seems to have vanished, at least in those who fall under the media spotlight. Laddette culture seems to demand the very lowest taste and cheapest values. It used to be argued by feminists that men kept women in subjugation and used them for their own selfish desires. But what has happened to the modern woman with freedom? -- she often behaves like a slut and describes it as empowerment. It is a true saying that it takes two to tango.

There was a time when girls excised self control, self respect and decency. It didn't mean that they hadn't any feelings or natural desires just a wish to retain their dignity and postpone pleasure till the appropriate time. A blush shows that a person, whose natural feelings and instincts have been aroused, perhaps inappropriately, feels embarrassed; but this confirms the innate decency of the person as their civilised mind struggles to control their instinctive programming.

By exercising discipline and control we can avoid allowing our instinctive side to leads us into actions that our better half will regret later.

In the film "Gone with the Wind" the two girls are the two sides of the author's nature -- the good, sensible girl that she was, and the suppressed, wild one that could only be indulged in fiction. In the ideal person we need to have a balance -- you can't be too good and it is advisable not to be too bad. A blush will help to warn you that you might be about to do something that will come back to haunt you.

To lead a life of total goodness would be too boring for most people but you have to decide what kind of person you are. Humans come in a bewilderingly wide range of types -- different standards, values and attitudes apply to each.

You will experience most grief if you act out of character. For example, if you are a basically "nice girl next door" type, a wild, drunken orgy on holiday will probably be bitterly regretted especially when the self-respecting guy who is attracted to your natural self discovers this aberration. The best you can hope for is that he has a forgiving nature and you don't have any competition.

The magic of falling in love often enables us to forgive and forget past errors but when love is tested by time old wounds can open and bleed afresh.

It could take a whole lot of tears to wash away the spot that a blush might have prevented.

Women's Wisdom

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