The house is a fine house when good folks are within

The wealthy man in his mansion has a fine house to show off to his friends but are they true friends or just attracted to his wealth? Fair-weather friends are not there when you need them.

The poor man with his simple abode knows true happiness when genuine friends come to share his table and enjoy each other's company. The quality of the surroundings doesn't matter when the people are genuine. In times of need they help each other and are likely to know more of life's truest pleasures and satisfactions than the possessor of material riches.

Just as a fine instrument won't make a mediocre player better, or an expensive PC improve poor software, so a grand house won't necessarily provide the venue for good company and fellowship.

As a memorial to a fine man who was a friend to all the author of your blog wrote a tribute song "Ol' Jim (Magic in Them Feet)" now available as a digital download from iTunes and other stores.
Ol' Jim (Magic in Them Feet)

The full story of how a thrown away banknote led to this song can be read here:

The Story of the Song

Ol' Jim (Magic in Them Feet)

A friend in need is a friend indeed

Today I would like to tell you about a man who was a friend to many.

This is the age of the Internet and, as you know, it is constructed from software. In the background in homes and offices all over the globe men and women struggle away to produce the programs we all now rely on. Many of these toilers are self-employed with no colleagues or fellow workers for support and companionship. It can be a lonely and stressing existence.

Thankfully, due to the Internet, it is possible to reach out and make contact with other like-minded souls. The discussion forum can be a godsend for such people. It was on one such forum a very memorable and unique individual, Jim Wolfmeyer, could be found.

Jim was an ex US army sergeant major with a background in missile defense who used his computer expertise in a friendly and engaging manner to help people from all around the globe of every kind, creed and color. His American country boy style, humor and linguistic quirks made him a unique and unforgettable character.

As a memorial to this fine man the author of your blog wrote a tribute song "Ol' Jim (Magic in Them Feet)" now available as a digital download from iTunes and other stores.

Ol' Jim (Magic in Them Feet)

The full story of how a thrown away banknote led to this song can be read here:

The Story of the Song

Whenever you were in need, Jim was a friend indeed.

Repentance is good but innocence is better

We all make mistakes; do things we regret later. When the consequences of our actions or words hit home we feel remorse and wish our ways had been different. We can repent, say we are sorry, and try to make amends.

How genuinely sorry are we? Sorry for what we did or feeling sorry for ourselves because we have to suffer the fall out? The purpose of emotional pain is to teach us a lesson: we act wrongly and suffer the result. Sometimes we suffer when it is not our fault, or it does not seem to be, but we often have no choice in these circumstances other than to adopt a philosophical attitude and struggle on.

Trying to understand the complexities of cause and effect is very difficult. Is it possible for any of us to lead a totally innocent life in a competitive world?

Innocence is not always enough to prevent harm coming your way but in many cases it does help to put the odds in your favor.

Prosperity knows not the worth of patience

When people have more than enough they grow careless and start to waste food clothing and other necessity's of life. They take luxuries for granted. Why discipline yourself when there is plenty to go around?

The result is we begin to overindulge, grow fat and lazy and slip into all sorts of bad habits. Drinkers and smokers consume to excess and damage their health. Credit becomes easily available and leads to more excess of consumption. When you have to save for something it forces you to evaluate how much it really means to you and if you can do without.

When your budget is tight you are more aware of the relative value of things and have to get your priorities right.


A Happy and prosperous New Year to you all.

Put your hand quickly to hat and slowly to purse

This dates from the days when most men wore hats and lifted them politely to ladies to show respect. It encourages the importance of good manners and regard for the rights of others.

But it also cautions you to be wary about money matters. It is all very well to be kind and considerate but charity begins at home. Being too generous to misfortunate others could end up bankrupting yourself and it is always a lot better to be able to give, than have to receive, a handout.

So, the advice is: be a good, considerate person but don't be over generous or careless with your finances.

Bad luck often brings good luck

We all suffer bad luck from time to time: financial, emotional or just a broken cup, but it is rarely the end of the world. The loss of a job can be devastating but many people have found new and more worthwhile careers as a result of a down spell. Take time to revaluate your life and find new and better direction. Losing a partner will hurt but can lead to meeting someone more suitable.

The important thing about a random chance event that knocks you back is to look for the silver lining. Most very successful people have had major setbacks in their lives but they didn't let it stop them. Where there's a will there's a way.

After you have licked your wounds, stop feeling sorry for yourself and get on with life.

You may give him good advice, but who can give him the wit to take it?

This is a saying that might have the ladies smiling a knowing smile, and brings to mind some lines by the Scottish poet Robert Burns:

"O gentle dames it gars me greet (makes me cry)
Tae see how many counsels sweet
How many lengthy, sage advices
The husband frae the wife despises."

How often in your life have you been given what you know to be good advice but failed to take it? Humans are not entirely rational beings and our emotional impulses often outweigh reasoned thought.

However, part of what a man loves in a woman is the irrational, exuberant disregard for reason when they allow their hearts to overrule their heads and fall in love with him.

Better a blush on the face than a spot on the heart

The day and age of the "nice girl" seems to have vanished, at least in those who fall under the media spotlight. Laddette culture seems to demand the very lowest taste and cheapest values. It used to be argued by feminists that men kept women in subjugation and used them for their own selfish desires. But what has happened to the modern woman with freedom? -- she often behaves like a slut and describes it as empowerment. It is a true saying that it takes two to tango.

There was a time when girls excised self control, self respect and decency. It didn't mean that they hadn't any feelings or natural desires just a wish to retain their dignity and postpone pleasure till the appropriate time. A blush shows that a person, whose natural feelings and instincts have been aroused, perhaps inappropriately, feels embarrassed; but this confirms the innate decency of the person as their civilised mind struggles to control their instinctive programming.

By exercising discipline and control we can avoid allowing our instinctive side to leads us into actions that our better half will regret later.

In the film "Gone with the Wind" the two girls are the two sides of the author's nature -- the good, sensible girl that she was, and the suppressed, wild one that could only be indulged in fiction. In the ideal person we need to have a balance -- you can't be too good and it is advisable not to be too bad. A blush will help to warn you that you might be about to do something that will come back to haunt you.

To lead a life of total goodness would be too boring for most people but you have to decide what kind of person you are. Humans come in a bewilderingly wide range of types -- different standards, values and attitudes apply to each.

You will experience most grief if you act out of character. For example, if you are a basically "nice girl next door" type, a wild, drunken orgy on holiday will probably be bitterly regretted especially when the self-respecting guy who is attracted to your natural self discovers this aberration. The best you can hope for is that he has a forgiving nature and you don't have any competition.

The magic of falling in love often enables us to forgive and forget past errors but when love is tested by time old wounds can open and bleed afresh.

It could take a whole lot of tears to wash away the spot that a blush might have prevented.

Women's Wisdom

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Respect yourself or no one else will

Charity begins at home and so does self respect. Treating yourself properly sets a standard that others can recognise. If you dress badly, eat foolishly, act promiscuously and drink to excess you are sending out a message that you don't hold yourself in high regard. The result is that others do the same they treat you by the same standards.

If you look after yourself and project the image of a valued, well-cared for person people will expect to deal with you on the same terms. Consider how public property is often vandalised and maltreated -- it lacks an owner's pride and attention so the public treat it with contempt. The same applies to people -- set your personal standards high and expect others to do the same.

Respect, yes, but remember that pride comes before a fall so reasonable humility will gain you more respect than arrogant assumptions of superiority.

Women's Wisdom

Monday is the key of the week

This appears to be a musical analogy. If you hit the right note to begin with the melody of the week will flow harmoniously. Getting off to a good start sets the tone for what follows -- well begun is half done. Start off on the right foot.

Thinking of locks it might refer to opening or beginning when you prepare for what is to follow. A good plan or strategy for the week will ease the flow of work and increase productivity.

Thought of as a keystone it might be seen as the connection between one week and the next.

Purchase the next world with this; you will win both

If we assume that the next word is a place of perfection, and the entry standards are high, it makes sense to be getting into good shape to pass the exams.

This saying appears to be suggesting that by pursuing levels of excellence with a view to "celestial glory" we will do ourselves a great deal of good here on Earth. If you practise the traditional values of the major world religions they should make you a more dependable, trustworthy person. When others recognise this they will feel safe in your company and trust you in business matters.

So, by preparing for Heaven you gain the world.



Women's Wisdom

When the play is best it is best to leave

Now it is unlikely that this is meant to be taken literally -- how would we ever get our money's worth?

At the present time we have lived through financial turmoil with house prices crashing and stocks sinking but not so long ago everything seemed rosy. "If only we had sold when things were going so well," the cry goes up.

Those who left when the play was at its best knew a thing or two.

Women's Wisdom

Rest and success are fellows

We are often led to believe that success comes from excessive effort -- tales of high-powered executives working eighteen hour days abound but there must be a limit.

If your job is very exciting and you can regard it as your hobby as well as your work then the long hours might be less wearisome. However, a tired, stressed person is unlikely to make good judgements so it is necessary to get adequate rest to recharge your batteries. The establishment of Sunday as a day of rest probably boosted production in the long run.

Some high achieving people like Sir Winston Churchill strongly believed in the importance of an afternoon nap. Rested and invigorated the mind will function better. Success in difficult circumstances will sometimes require a long burst of sustained effort so it is important to be at your best and fittest when the supreme challenge arises and you have to keep going till you drop.

Women's Wisdom

Reckless youth makes rueful age

When we are young life stretches out for ever -- old is what somebody else is. We have strength and vigour; late nights and excesses can be coped with. Live for today -- the future will take care of itself.

We eventually learn the truth but by that time a lot of damage has been done. The cry goes up: "If only I had listened." But can the young learn from being told? Without some experience words are just words.

If you want to pass on your wealth of knowledge from "been there, done that" you need to find a way to give the young the equivalent of a flu jag. A limited experience sufficient to provide a stimulus to learn that wises up its recipient without permanent damage.

Rest and success are fellows

Hard work over time generally brings advantage. So it is a good thing then? Well, like all good things, too much tips you into a bad place.

Wise people know the benefits of a well-rested body and mind. There might be times in your life when the pressures mount and it is extremely difficult to cope. You might end up sleep deprived and suffering physical deterioration. It goes without saying that this is something to avoid but if you find yourself in this situation it might be necessary to grit your teeth and summon every reserve you have to struggle through.

However, in normal circumstances you should plan to have proper rest and relaxation so that you are more able to head off a crisis before it fully strikes. Prevention is better than cure.

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Prosperity destroys fools and endangers the wise

Success breeds complacency. If you are not very wise you will tend to assume that riches and happiness are your right and entitlement. You might even assume that your good fortune is part of the natural order of things.

The wise person might not be so naive and have some awareness that good times can vanish but when things have been good for a long time even the knowledgeable can be lulled into a false sense of security. They know things can go wrong but not always when. As a result they can be caught napping.

Just as Caesar employed someone to stand behind him, as he received the adulation of the crowds, to remind him he was not a god, you might be wise to put a note of this saying somewhere as an aide memoire.

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Repentance is the May of the virtues

There are times in life when you get it wrong. "You screw up" in modern parlance. So how do you react? Most of us tend to retreat into denial: we look for excuses, justifications or escape clauses. But sometimes there aren't any so you must "fess up", take the rap, hold up your hands, take it on the chin.

Once you accept your wrongdoing and see no wriggle room what is the best way forwards? When you have achieved the state of mind of paying the price or accepting due punishment you are ready to repent: to show contrition and make amends.

This saying suggests penitence is a time of renewal just like May is the time of year when new growth recreates the glories of Nature. Having acknowledged your wrongdoing and accepted the consequences you can move on and renew your life.

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He that is worst may still hold the candle

Imagine a disaster scene where people are trapped in a collapsed building. Many are injured and the fit desperately try to dig their way out. It makes sense that one of the wounded holds the candle whilst the able work.

This saying tells us that we should contribute to life as much as we can even if we are disadvantaged. The old lady who makes the tea while the young and vigorous apply themselves to the task at hand makes a very useful contribution. The elderly gentleman who grows some organic vegetables to help feed his grandchildren because the parents are too busy contributes according to his ability and circumstances.

We all have something to give or contribute to the general well-being no matter how poorly or hard done by we are, and in return we share in the success.

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Who lives without folly is not so wise as he thinks

The 17th-century physicist-turned-theologian Blaise Pascal said, "The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing." This appears to be warning us against the total reliance on logic or what might appear to be logic.

Life is immensely complex and the ability of the human mind to absorb information and process it is limited. This is perhaps why Nature has equipped us with intuition and instinct. Creative people are aware that there is often an "unseen hand" involved in their works; they might attribute this to the subconscious or God or some unknowable force.

The "folly" in this saying is not foolishness but that more playful, instinctive side that we all have but which tends to get suppressed in the need to conform and hold down a regular job. Those individuals whose lot in life is to follow their hearts will know highs and lows; the strict logician will shake his head, but we are meant to live in a harmonious balance between emotion and reason.


Women's Wisdom

The tree falls not at the first stroke

The lumberjack sharpens his axe, rolls up his sleeves and lays into the tree with a will. If it has worthwhile timber it will take many skilful blows to bring it down before conversion to a useful purpose begins.

This saying uses a metaphor to make us aware that anything worthwhile takes time and effort. You must prepare, equip yourself with the right resources and take time to apply your skills to the task. Some trees are awkward to fell: their branches tangle with others or they lean at an troublesome angle. Other life tasks have equivalent problems.

Just as the good woodman will show preparation, patience and perseverance, you also must use these qualities as you tackle your own tasks.

Women's Wisdom